Something I’ve noticed a lot when a lot of my friends talk about guys is how to the floor their standards are. “I want a guy who will treat me nicely!” “Any guy who isn’t a total asshole.” When a guy shows a common shred of decency to them they’ll gush about how sweet and well-mannered he is.
I actually read an opinion article on this on The Peak News a few weeks ago that I agree with wholeheartedly. It’s really not that a majority of my friends are super desperate and want a boyfriend that badly. A lot of girls (if not most) think similar thoughts. I do as well sometimes. Guys who are decent human beings seem amazing. It has to do a lot with how our society is traditionally driven and run by men, for men. In many cases, men are glorified for just existing. Society lowers standards so much for men that a guy who is nice, loyal and treats you – uh – not terribly is considered a rare GEM among all men when that’s just – how your partner should treat you?
Like The Peak article mentioned, I see this trend a lot on social media – girls posting about how their boyfriend bought them McDonald’s after work and thousands of people gushing in response about how they wish they had a boyfriend like that, how that girl is so lucky – because her boyfriend bought her fast food? After a long day of work? I’d do that for a lot of my friends and family, and I’m sure a lot of other people out there would as well. Isn’t the bar set a little too low?
Don’t get me wrong, I think gestures like that are totally sweet and should be appreciated – props to that guy for being a sweet boyfriend – but to that extent? If I do the dishes without being told does that make me the best daughter in the world? Are thousands of mothers across the world going to hashtag me #DaughterGoals and wish their daughters are like me? No, because that’s absolutely ridiculous, and you know it.
Tweets like these are kind of sad and showcase what I’m talking about.
date a boy who works hard, loves his momma, and sings in the car with u
— Common Girl (@FIirtationship) February 3, 2018
When I'm your girlfriend i don’t even be wanting shit, but your attention, effort, and for you to not have me looking stupid.
— When Boys (@CraveMyThoughts) February 4, 2018
I wanna go on a cute date with a boy who actually cares about me actually has good intentions and actually wants me for me is that to hard?
— Tinsley (@TinsleyCalder) February 1, 2018
How is it that the standards in these tweets for men are so low, yet so many of them fail to even meet these standards?
i'm a needy girlfriend but not like "buy me this, buy me that" more like "call me, facetime me, text back fast, come over & love me" lol
— When Boys (@CraveMyThoughts) January 31, 2018
Since when was wanting to be loved by your significant other considered needy?
I’m putting this post in my ‘lifestyle’ tag because I feel like this is an important thing for a lot of girls to live their life knowing – men really aren’t all that. A lot of my friends would date guys who would treat them badly, show them up all the time ‘but it was ok cause he’s nice to me!’
It makes me sad seeing as so many girls undervalue themselves all for a boy who (excuse my language) doesn’t do shit, and you can see how that culture of thought is perpetuated through social media.
Go ahead and do yourself a favour: date a guy who doesn’t expect to be praised for doing the bare minimum.